The first line of the new trailer for "Sonic the Hedgehog"? "I'm Sonic, a superenergy ball in an extremely beautiful package. "
Emphasis on the "extremely beautiful package," because the folks at Paramount have come back and fixed Sonic's absolutely awful look since the first peek in the movie.
It wasn't a drastic change in the trailer that came out on Tuesday, but it's an adjustment that will allow the audience to sleep at night.
In April, the internet went berserk when the super fast Sega character appeared with shiny, shiny human teeth right in the face. In which universe does a hedgehog have human teeth – much less, big, huge, my-agent-made-me-get these teeth? Not this one for sure.
Here's a look at old Sonic, whose debut teeth outnumbered the costar helicopters James Marsden as Tom Wachowski and Jim Carrey as Dr. Ivo Robotnik:
Truth be told, the teeth of Sonic 2.0 are essentially the same – they're just a little bit more hidden and a lot less brighter. Sometimes just a little discretion (in addition to the first trailer being removed from YouTube).
What the change did was take the Sonic helicopters out of focus and put it back in the movie, which in the trailer seems to have a chance to be quite fun.
The hedgehog is having fun walking the earth, you see, having fled his own planet to protect his powers. But now it has been discovered by the government.
"They are coming to me," Sonic explains to shocked Wachowski, the rural policeman who becomes the reluctant friend of the blue bug road. "If they steal my power, they can conquer the universe."
And for a movie about a supersonic hedgehog, it's all the plot you need – if you add a performance by Carrey, who may be the first villain in the movie to mimic a stripper's pole dance.
"Sonic the Hedgehog", which has not yet been rated, is expected in theaters on Valentine's Day.